Target Fail

Dear Target,

I thought we had something together. Every weekend we'd see each other and spend time together – and it was wonderful! – and I always left you feeling satisfied. I would show up early when very few people were around. I'd bring my iced coffee and stroll leisurely, taking pictures and texting family and friends and just TRULY enjoying our time together.

You offered me so much more than anyone else; you were everything under one roof. Especially with the news of Baby M and all of the wonderfulness you had to share – from cute clothes to helping me create a registry gift list.

You were my rock.
I never thought I'd find fault in you.

Until Saturday.

It hurts to utter these words but, Target, you disappointed me.

A few Sundays ago, friends and family gathered together to shower Baby M with gifts. Their generosity was overwhelming. I wasn't sure our living room would recover:

As with any shower, I got a few duplicate items. (I know Sofie is an international teething phenomenon, but how many chewy giraffes can one baby have??)

So on Saturday I packed my trunk with my duplicate gifts, picked up my mother, and headed to Target.

I did not have gift receipts for 99% of what was in my car, but this has to happen all of the time, right? People returning shower gifts? To the store at which they were registered?

At customer service I was instructed to print a "Gift Registry Log" from their kiosks.

Well – shocker – the system was down.

KK: "Can I print off the "purchased items" registry so you can see they were purchased and then I can return them?"

Customer Service: "No. I need the bar codes."

KK: "The bar codes are on the products."

CS: "But I need the bar codes FIRST then I scan the products."
You need a bar code and then you'll scan a bar code?

KK: "Ok. There has to be another way to do this. How else can I return this stuff?"

CS: "You can return it against your license without a receipt, but there's a limit."

KK: "What kind of limit?"

CS: "$70"

KK: "A day?"

CS: "No, a year."

Um, well that's not going to work. I have two rubber giraffes that cost $25 EACH in these bags.

MOM: "What if we call a bunch of people to come down with their licenses to help out?" God love her.

KK: "No. That's not the right way to do this. These were gifts, off of a registry from this store. There has to be another way."

CS: "There's no other way."

KK: "You have to understand where I'm coming from here. Most of this stuff is from my registry. I'm questioning the validity of the registry as a whole, since I registered for TWO sets of giraffe sheets and I got SIX, and friends have told me they had the sheets taken off the registry, but that's another issue entirely. I don't understand how I'm being penalized for returns when YOUR system isn't working. Find another way to make this work."

CS: (staring at me, not helping)

This went on for about 20 minutes. You know how they say when you're in a relationship you're the last one to see how ridiculous you're being? Well, that was me – with Target – on Saturday. I was the lunatic in Customer Service with a cart filled with onesies and butt cream and rubber animals.

KK: "So you won't take any of this back against my registry? Not one thing?"

I wanted to scream, 'Don't you know who I am??? I'm here every week! My family is close to staging an intervention with my habit with you! I thought we had something special! I feel so used!'

But, instead, I turned my cart around, head held high, and headed out to the parking lot.

And guess what, Target? I went to Carter's today for baby clothes.

AND I LIKED IT.