Day 20: Feeling flat.

Today Max and I were visiting a friend for lunch so we were all dressed up. Max in his hipster eyeglasses onesie and navy pants with tartan plaid cuffs (ridiculously cute), and me in jeans, a cream colored knit shawl and my brown suede booties with the SLIGHT wedge heel.

I was carrying Max in his car seat out to the car in the driveway when I fell. While I was carrying the baby.

I KNOW.

Our driveway is old and VERY uneven, and there's a hole in the asphalt where it meets the concrete of the garage. And my foot caught the hole the wrong way.

I remember thinking, "Oh my god, I'm falling while I'm carrying the baby. My family is going to kill me. I'm going to break the baby!"

The whole thing happened in slow motion. I was falling forward, both hands on the handle of the car seat. I just wanted to hold onto to him tightly. 

The car seat barely hit the ground with a soft bump, bump – completely upright.

Max is fine. (Should I have started with that?) My left knee, however, has seen better days.

Yeah, that's going to leave a mark.

In fact, Max had no idea something went wrong; he didn't even wake up. I think my right hand reached out for the car. My left hand was on the handle of the car seat. But it was my knee that took the brunt of the fall. All that was going through my mind was, "Don't let go of the car seat!" and "I'm never wearing heels again!"

I was a little dazed right after, sort of like when you were younger and you'd get the wind knocked out of you in gym class. My knee hurt like a bitch, but miraculously my jeans didn't rip.

I hobbled over to the car and put Max into his car seat. My little nugget opened an eye to give me a once-over then went back to sleep. 

I gingerly climbed into the driver's seat and sat there for a few minutes. Had I really forgotten how to walk in heels over the last 6 weeks? Has that part of my pre-Max life completely shut down? What's next for me? Mom jeans???

I knew what I had to do. It broke my heart, but it was time to be Max's Mom and tuck my heels into the back of closet. Adios, my friends. We had a good run. I quietly mourned my kitten heel black booties; those camel ankle boots that are the softest leather in the universe that I love so much; and my new metallic pointy toe heels that I've only worn 3 times and that go with everything. 

It's time for this Mama to go all flats, all the time. (Don't worry, heels, I'll dust you guys off for date night!)

Proof that Max is FINE; here he is in his food coma that same afternoon:

My knee, on the other hand, is a pretty black and blue and has a shooting pain every time I forgetfully kneel on it.