So we got a baby. His name is Max.
I knew something was up, though. Mommy didn't raise a dummy.
Mom and Dad started changing around the room where people who visited us would sleep. They painted the walls (I'm color blind so I'm not sure what color) and bought all new furniture.
They even bought a bed for me. It's HUGE. And I hate to admit it, but I LOVE that bed. It's so big and soft.
And the best part is every time I go in the room and hop on my bed, they reward me a treat. I spend a lot of time in that room jumping onto that bed.
I knew it was coming, I just didn't know when. My Daddy even sat me down and had a chat with me to prepare me. But still, I wasn't sure what was going on.
Daddy: "You're going to be a big brother, Vito. We're having a baby."
Vito: "But I'M the baby."
I was extra suspicious when I started getting a Bark Box every month filled with goodies. My humans are good. They know how to get me.
I mean, who could resist a toy of a hedgehog wearing a chef's hat?
The worst part of this whole baby thing was going to kennel. I HATE the kennel. I have to stay with my cousin Dino and I never know how long we're going to be there. But I have my fun. I don't let any of those people who work there near me. I growl at them when they try and put on a leash and make them throw my treats into the crate. They're afraid of me which is really very silly; I would never harm anyone, I just like to bark. And sometimes scare people.
When they sprung me from the kennel I didn't go home. I went to Dino's house for a day and that's when I knew. When Daddy came and picked me up he kept talking about the baby was home and how cute Baby Max was. I was suspicious. I'd have to see this thing for myself.
Is this all he does?
Well, it's been a while and the baby isn't that bad. I guess he's cute in a human sort of way. Mommy and Daddy pay an awful lot of attention to him. And this kid gets to eat like six or seven times a day! How can I get on that meal plan???
Everyone who comes over asks the same question, "How is Vito with the Baby?"
I can tell you: Vito is fine with the baby. Max just kind of lays there. When he's on the floor I run up to him and stick my nose in his face and say hi, but he doesn't do much in return. When everyone is in his room I hang out there, too. I watch what's going on (that kid poops more than I do!) and make sure he's okay.
This is us "playing" together. Bo-ring.
I could do without the getting up in the middle of the night, but Mommy pretty much takes care of that.
He hasn't taken over the big bed yet, so we're cool. Because that's where I draw the line. The big bed is mine, Max.
Don't even THINK about getting on this bed, Max.
The couch too.
I get my belly rubs on here and lay all over Daddy's legs.
Daddy brought you up here the other day. I'm keeping an eye on you.
And I still have more toys than you do.
But I know we'll be best friends when you get bigger. Then you can tell me how I can get a few more meals out of Mommy and Daddy.